I have a few spiritual attacks recently, one yesterday, and two today. As you all know, I have been newly transferred to Corporate Admin Services in UBS and at the same time, taking the role of Mailroom Team Leader as well. 2 roles at a time, tough... The sad thing was, my friend told me yesterday that someone from my mailroom team backstab me, saying I so stupid go work for UBS. I was like, hello? Can I say no when my manager ask me whether I'm able to take the role? It was kinda disappointing to say things like that coming from your own team.
Today, I had another shock with what my supervisor asked me. Because of my new role in UBS, I don't have much time to be in the mailroom. She asked me, "Actually you HAVE time to come back mailroom one, right? How come last time Rahman is so free? Now you take over from him and you seems so busy?". This was a big stab on my heart, I put 120% on my work and now she's saying that I'm acting busy on purpose? I bet she didn't realise Rahman's been working in UBS for 25 years and he can do his things with 2 eyes closed and get it done within the hour? Which she didn't even know that he's not doing his job well for the past 25 years because I found a lot of errors and loopholes in his records and work?
At night, after the relaxed chit chat with my old colleague from ORQ, I discovered that one colleague from my previous mailroom team at ORQ said I don't deserve the "Best Employee Award". He says I'm always on leave, MC and criticize my way of working... I'm pretty shaken by all these remarks... Each hit was like hammering on my confidence and faith. By all these jealous ppl who will only criticize just because they are not the one at the top. I prayed and prayed, and I thank God for giving me this, "forgive & forget" attitude that I'm able to get over it before the night ends. Jiayou wor, I can do it!
Time to take a bath and make myself "clean" again... ^_^
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